There’s a reason you should always consider a phone call when delivering bad news to someone. An email may not come off the way you intend.
Elle relays the story of a bride named Alex who decided her bridesmaid Courtney wasn’t going to cut it for the wedding. Or as she refers to it: the event.
“The whirlwind nature of what your travel has become just won’t work with the duties as a party member,” the bride said in an email.
Courtney, Alex admits, has had a lot on her plate with business school, but if she cares at all about Alex’s wedding, she will do the right thing and step down. But there’s one more thing: the jumpsuit.
“And I know this is incredibly awkward,” Alex said, “but there is a possibility that I might be able to have someone else step into the role and assume the duties. Could you please mail the jumpsuit to me?”
As the result of this email, Courtney reached out to JetBlue to cancel the ticket. The tweet, which has since been deleted, said in part, “I am laughing & crying & must avoid this wedding at all costs. Pls help?” The request went viral. Courtney’s Twitter account is now private.
Below is the full email that Alex sent to Courtney. To say that it is awkward and passive aggressive and self-aggrandizing is an understatement.
Hey!
I’m so glad to hear you booked flights! I’m sorry classes are taking such a long time to sort out. I know how hard you’re working to be here for the wedding and it means so much to us!
I have a massive favor to ask you, though — and this is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to ask anyone — but I need to ask you to relinquish your duties as a bridesmaid.
Come to the wedding, have a fabulous time, and travel in the time you need to without stressing about anything else!
When I asked you, I was really hoping that you could be a part of this whole thing — the bachelorette trip, at least the weekend, prep and the full night of the event (a Sunday night flight means you won’t even be able to be there for the whole wedding)... the whirlwind nature of what your travel has become just won’t work with the duties as a party member. I’m so, so sorry!!
Please don’t feel you’re letting me down, I am asking you to do this. I love you and value your friendship so much and I fully understand the need for you to prioritize school! I want you to be able to focus on that without also worrying about any extra wedding worries.
And I know this is incredibly awkward, but there is a possibility that I might be able to have someone else step into the role and assume the duties. Could you please mail the jumpsuit to me? I’ll Venmo you the postage and the cost of the jumpsuit — just let me know the total.
I know everyone is looking forward to seeing you there! I know I am!
And if you’d like to chat on the phone, let me know! I promise we’re totally cool!
All my love,
Alex
JetBlue did respond though, offering Courtney a girls’ weekend on the airline when she and Alex inevitably have to patch things up.