The Sympathy Gifts That Brought Grieving People Some Actual Comfort

Even though the experience of loss is universal, grief is a thoroughly complex and individual process. It’s one of the trickiest life moments we encounter, and every single one of us will likely go through it at some point in our lives, whether it’s the death of a family member, spouse or beloved pet, a miscarriage or gut-wrenching heartbreak. And despite that, many find it difficult to know how to support loved ones who are grieving. Until you’re deep in it yourself, it’s hard to know the right thing to do.

But that doesn’t mean that you should do nothing when you know someone who is grieving. Reaching out, even if just to touch base and let them know you’re thinking about them, can mean the world and help their healing journey. And if you’re someone who likes to send thoughtful gifts to show your support, then there are many that can be meaningful and kind.

Licensed art therapist Ingrid Mellor said there are various ways we can help the people in our lives who are experiencing grief. If it is a person that you are very close to, she emphasized that “the most important thing we can do is to show up reliably and consistently.” This includes checking in to see how they are doing, listening and offering support in whatever way is appropriate to your relationship. She also recommends asking what you can do to help, instead of asking if you can help. It is, however, “important to remain mindful of different boundaries with people like co-workers, acquaintances, long-lost exes, etc.,” she said. Basically, don’t make it weird or about you.

When it comes to finding ways to make yourself useful to a person who is grieving, Mellor’s advice is to lean into your own unique skill set. “Are you organized? Maybe they need help going through the belongings of the person they lost,” she said. “Are you a good listener with a good memory? Perhaps you can be their go-to person for support at appointments.”

You can also help to connect them to helpful resources, such as grief counselors and support groups like Red Door Community and bereavement programs at Ronald McDonald House.

When it comes to sympathy gifts, Mellor recommends starting with food: “I love Mealtrain, a website that lets you organize food deliveries for people.” But meals can come in the form of gift certificates to meal delivery apps, restaurant delivery or even signing up to deliver a home-cooked meal, which Mellor noted is a personal touch that can feel really comforting. Beyond that, she recommends cozy, tactile items and something to help them honor the person they lost, like a scrapbook or memory book.

Below, we’ve rounded up a list of 11 sympathy gifts that brought comfort to people when they were in the midst of processing a loved one’s death. It includes both small tokens of love as well as incredibly moving and thoughtful larger gestures. Keep this list on hand when someone you know has suffered a loss and could use a bit of extra love and comfort from the people in their lives.