Cover your kids’ faces so that they are unrecognizable and send them off in the dark to interact with strangers ... what could possibly go wrong? The Halloween trick or treat tradition is equal parts bizarre and beloved, a rite of passage for kids and parents alike.
Here, some of social media’s wittiest parents share their thoughts on this unique institution.
You think you hit the parent lottery when your kid is finally old enough to trick or treat the neighborhood w/o you freezing your ass off while tagging along to supervise until they come home w a sack full of empty candy wrappers & wtf I just lost my personal candy distributor
— MomTransparenting (@momtransparent1) November 1, 2021
my mom and stepdad used to find all types of suspicious candy in our trick or treat bags every year so to keep us safe they would take it and eat it themselves to make sure it was safe because they really loved us
— Shawn In Arizona 🌵 (@ShawnInArizona) October 20, 2022
*five children approach house, say Trick or Treat, immediately start trying to take the same pieces of candy*
— Lillie Lainoff (@lillielainoff) October 31, 2022
small child to other children: this is someone's HOME. Be RESPECTFUL.
We trick or treat on the 30th here. Last night the neighbor was giving out XL Kit Kats (not even regular size). Anna came running in, changed her costume, went out again and was back in 1 minute with a second one.
— Just Bren Is Fine (@ogbrenna) October 31, 2018
If a kid doesn’t even look up from their phone while saying “trick or treat,” you’re allowed to put whatever you want in there. Creamed corn? Sure. The skin your snake left behind after it molted? Why not
— The Dad (@thedad) October 30, 2022
Hey kids, it’s very simple: don’t trick or treat at my house if you don’t like quinoa clusters.
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) October 25, 2019
A young lad knocked on my door last night and said, "Trick or Treat?" I said, "What have you come as?" He said, "A werewolf." I said, "but you haven't got a costume on, you're just in normal clothes." He said, "Well it's not a full moon, is it."
— 💂🏻♀️👋🏻вєαя🍻🇬🇧™ (@BigBearF1) October 24, 2022
Last year I opened the door to a kid doing ‘trick or treat’ in a Gloria Gaynor mask!
— The Dad Joke Man (@DadJokeMan) October 31, 2022
At first I was afraid...#Halloween#halloween2022
My financial goal? To become a "full size candy bar" house on the Trick or Treat circuit.
— Shannon (@ShannonJCurtin) September 28, 2022
My daughter knocked and said "trick or treat" to my husband through the bathroom door. I think it's going to be a trick.
— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) October 28, 2016
The first wave of East Coast trick-or-treaters is upon us and I for one would like to give a shout-out to the five year old who, rather than saying “trick or treat,” went with the more direct “I need candy.”
— Daniel W. Drezner (@dandrezner) October 31, 2022
Kid came to my house, maybe 10 yrs old, to trick or treat. He didn’t have a bag.
— LoveAndyC (@LoveAndyC) October 31, 2022
Me: Do you need me to get you a bag for your candy?
Superman: Nope, I’m eating as I go.
💀💀💀
my 13 yo decided not to dress up or trick or treat this year. he's giving up free candy to watch movies with his friend and the kid in me wants to beat him up for not taking advantage of free candy
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) October 31, 2022
Reminded my daughter to bring her trick or treat bag with her. She said, "I don't need one. I'm just going to eat the candy as they hand it to me." If that's not the Halloween spirit I don't know what is.
— Henpecked Hal (@HenpeckedHal) October 31, 2022
The fun part about #Halloween in Florida, is having to cover your kids in sunscreen before they trick-or-treat in 90 degree weather while the sun is still out. Just kidding. It sucks.
— Rachel Sobel (@whinecheezits) October 31, 2019
SON: trick or treat!
— The Dad (@thedad) October 31, 2020
ME: what do you say?
SON: thank you!
ME: *whispering* no, that's for full sized candy bars. he gave you smarties.
SON: oh *turns to door* who hurt you
Be careful letting your kids trick-or-treat this year, as middle aged men are known to steal childrens candy in an attempt to make a point about tax policy
— James Medlock (@jdcmedlock) October 7, 2022
If you don't take a parent tax off your kids' candy they got from trick or treating, did they really trick or treat?
— Saint Vivica, Patron Saint of Pumpkin Tweets 🎃🎃 (@QueenVofCoffee) November 1, 2022
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