'The Bachelorette' Brings The Romance And The Drama In Week 2

I need her to have someone 1:1 time with Michael. The man’s dimples are incredible. If she don’t want him, I want him for me. Xavier definitely needs more screen time after that heroic performance in dodgeball. And whew, when Dotun said his full name to Charity on his 1:1? I swooned. I hope those three make it far. — Erin

The scenes from next week make it look like Aaron B. is about to go villain, which really changed my impression of the front-runners, because I would’ve definitely put him up there. Given that Adrian and Brayden are part of the drama, they’ll be outta here eventually. So my front-runners: Dotun was clearly a favorite when they talked; she definitely digs Joey and John; and Xavier can be there just because I, personally, enjoy looking at him. ― Elise

I really think Dotun and Xavier could be strong contenders in this show; they seem like great guys, and I want them to go far. Obviously I’m a fan of Joey’s, and in terms of an underdog, I think Warwick seems sweet, too. Fingers crossed my front-runners stay unproblematic! —Alexandra

Roses in order: Dotun, Tanner, Caleb B., Warwick, Michael, Sean, Xavier, Aaron S., James, Adrian and Brayden. Aaron B., John and Joey already had roses. That means going home are: Caleb A., Kaleb K., John Henry, Josh and Spencer. I can’t believe the Caleb who made it through is the long-haired wrestler. — Elise

Also, there were a bunch of WHO?! moments during the rose ceremony. Who is James? Like, literally I don’t know anything about him. Also, Sean can go, too. But at least I know who he is. Caleb B. should definitely be on the chopping block next week. Because … why? — Erin

James is the guy whose parents own an apple orchard! That’s the only thing I know. ― Elise

OK, that does ring a bell, actually! — Erin

Good riddance to Spencer, who gave me the creeps. I thought John Henry seemed sweet, although we didn’t know much about him, but sad to see him go home over Brayden. — Alexandra

I know there’s some debate in the internet/podcast world about whether Joey is a fuckboy, and I get it, but he’s just so cute. I loved his rare, for this show, explanation about his parent’s divorce after his dad came out as gay, and how his parents split but still set an example of a loving home. Not every family has to be the same, Bachelor producers! ― Elise

Yes, it was definitely refreshing to see him talk about his parents in this way. I hate how fraught it is on this show when someone’s parents are divorced or were never together. People can learn how to love and show their affection in other ways! — Erin

One question I have about this date: How long do you think it was? On TV it looked like about 5 minutes. I guess it’s still a good get, but I wonder if any part of Joey was bummed that his “one-on-one” was the equivalent of when you meet a Hinge date for a coffee so you can bolt quickly if you don’t like them. She, however, clearly does. ― Elise

It definitely seemed really short; like, I don’t really remember anything about it other than the parent talk. — Erin

Like I said last week, if Charity ends up dumping Joey at some point, I am interested and available. It seems like he really cares for her and makes her the center of his attention. Happy for both of them on this cute (but brief?) date. –Alexandra

Ya know, perhaps naively, I thought Brayden just had a one-off moment last week when he was hype about his Charity kiss. But now I know he is just … like that all the time, and it is annoying me so much. While I do stand with Adrian on the fact that Brayden seems a bit emotionally immature, I do not like that he’s become the tattletale of the season so far.

When you get in drama, it feels like you have started your own exit plan. Shoutout to him telling Charity she is smart enough to know and figure out who is there for her or not.

On the other hand with Brayden, it annoys me so much that he talks all big and bad in front of the other guys and then just straight up softens his complaints when he goes to Charity. Also, him announcing he packed his bags and was waiting for Charity to make it clear that she wants him to stay? I literally LOL’d when he said that. — Erin

I’m with Xavier, who said to the camera, “Adrian, what are you doing, bro?” Brayden definitely is immature, and I also hated how he spouted off to the guys and any camera that would listen about how he was definitely going to leave, then played it down to Charity. He’s not her future husband.

But Adrian’s Mr. Serious thing was annoying, too. I thought Brayden had a point earlier in the episode when Adrian was saying some guys were treating this like a vacation ― Brayden said, basically, that it’s OK to also have fun. And it is! These people aren’t paid, they oughtta treat it like a vacation. ― Elise

I had to laugh at Brayden saying, “I’m not going to put up with someone disrespecting a human being in any regard.” OK, Kendall Jenner, you can put down the Pepsi can.

Also, the way that Brayden is so incensed over her kissing Joey feels kind of slut-shamey to me. I could tell you right now that he’s the type of guy who, if he got to Fantasy Suites, would be so rude and mean about her sleeping with any of the other men. Do you not know how this show works?

I think Adrian is shooting himself in the foot by using his time with her to talk about the other guys, especially this early on. I understand Brayden is annoying (TRUST ME, I understand), but he’s going to tell on himself anyway at some point, so why not use the precious time you have with Charity to pump yourself up? An amateur mistake to make on this show. — Alexandra

On the date: Josh, John Henry, Michael, Warwick, Joey and Spencer.

In case anyone else is wondering, the actual longest recorded kiss in history is 58 hours, which makes the Bachelor record of 3 minutes and 22 seconds seem even more doable. Gabby and Rachel remind us that Sean Lowe, notably the only Bachelor to marry his final pick, holds that record ― no mention of the fact that it was with his future wife’s future bridesmaid. Joey and Charity get to 4:25. ― Elise

They only showed us a second of that Sean Lowe kiss, and it was definitely giving bad kisser vibes. But anyway, I mostly looked away at the kiss, but there’s a moment in the promo when Joey is kissing Charity like he was trying to include her nose, lips AND chin in the action. Did I miss that here? I hope so. — Erin

That still from the promo was chilling, Erin, but I saw no evidence in this episode of him eating her face. Joey was SMOOTH with it on this group date, props to him. The Bachelor producers are so foul for making the other guys watch Joey and Charity kiss for over 4 minutes and then immediately telling them they don’t even get to hang out with her that night. lolllll. — Alexandra

Going on the date: Dotun, Tanner, Adrian, John, Caleb A., Caleb B., Kaleb K., Xavier, James, Aaron S., Sean and Brayden.

So, where do you stand on the sports on this show and on the nudity? I appreciate the dodgeball for its lack of injuries ― not a single tease of an ambulance because someone hurt their finger! Or, more seriously, a possible concussion from people who know nothing about football fully tackling each other! But it was clearly WAY too cold to put these poor men in swimsuits. ― Elise

They were literally shivering! Also, I understand it’s reality television, but I really feel like the Speedos were unnecessary – could we not just give them shorts and have them play shirtless and it would have the same effect? This was not practical dodgeball gear. The odds were against them! – Alexandra

Some of the challenges I have actually HATED in the past because they get so gruesome. I can’t remember which season it was, but the men were boxing and it felt like they were REALLY fighting. This, thankfully, was calmer. However, WHY did they have the women who were watching the game standing BEHIND the players? Someone was bound to get hit with one of the Calebs’ — I think it was Caleb B. — fastballs. That really annoyed me the whole game. Move the spectators to the sides! — Erin

As someone who also went to camp every summer and played dodgeball all the time, I was loving Xavier on this group date. Charity made the right choice giving the rose to John because I was going to YELL if she gave it to Brayden again. ― Alexandra

Our tournament winners: Xavier, John, Brayden, James, Kaleb K., Caleb A.; Adrian goes on a date as MVP. This party was in one of those odd venues that has 100 little seating setups ― is it a furniture store? The only memorable things were Adrian and Brayden sniping and Charity loving that cute data scientist John is also a cute former pro basketball player. Rose to John. ― Elise

The double-sided coin is fake?! No shit. Aaron and Charity were bonding over having military parents, listening to classics on weekend mornings and their love of family when Charity brings up her parents’ 48-year marriage. She’s mentioned this before, but each time it really blows my mind ― she is 27, which means her parents had already been married two full decades before they had her. I find this show’s insistence that people with married parents are superior to be pretty annoying (more on that later), but it’s clearly a plus to Charity that Aaron’s family sounds like hers. She also loves when he mentions being in therapy. She is into this guy big time. ― Elise

Elise, that is such a good point – I totally understand that with this show, the goal is to find a husband and therefore have a happy marriage, but the dialogue about how having a long marriage makes for strong people is noooot it.

Also, Aaron’s gotta be done with the coin bit. It was only sort of cute the first time, and now it’s tired. This better be the last I see of it!

I am really liking him overall, I think he’s sweet, and he clearly makes Charity feel seen and adored (which she deserves!). We LOVE a man who has done the work in therapy, and it shows in his demeanor and his communication. ― Alexandra

I like Aaron B. for her a lot. They also briefly bonded over being really close to their siblings, which is really sweet. When he revealed that it was a two-sided coin, I was like now, sir, WE KNOW. I hope Charity knew, too. — Erin

I really would like Brayden to pick a red flag to put on display. Either it’s the fake Malcolm X glasses or the dangly earrings. Pick a struggle! It cannot be both.— Erin

I’m not joking when I say that I only got two minutes into the episode before I had to pause because I was laughing too hard over Brayden’s scarf/grandma earring/man bun combo.

This cardigan that Jesse is wearing at the beginning is cracking me up: Do you think that it’s an item of clothing that just appears in every man’s closet once they turn 35, or do they have to actively seek it out? ― Alexandra

Ha! Definitely magically appears. I loved Jesse’s quip that “I feel like Brayden was like, ‘I got the first impression rose ― fuck it.’” He’s more fun than Chris Harrison, clearly, and they should let him show it. — Elise