Not loo long ago, we published a series of posts in which people shared the worst, most cringeworthy, and most “memorable for all the wrong reasons” weddings they’ve ever attended. Here are the some of the best responses, along with some new ones from a recent Reddit thread where Reddit user git-sy asked people to share the worst wedding they’ve ever attended:
1. “When my uncle got married, the best man dropped the ring. In the dead silence of the church, you could hear it go, ‘Ting, ting, ting,’ as it bounced along the floor. One of the groomsmen whispered, ‘Jesus Christ,’ and the pastor — who didn’t even bat an eye — replied, ‘The ring has already been blessed, thank you.’”
2. “The officiant’s message included a whole part about mixing purple and green sand to make the color ‘gurple.’”
3. “Some of the groom’s family decided to prank the reception by dressing in Teletubbies costumes and running around to the theme music. But instead of wearing the matching Teletubbies masks, they wore cheap white plastic masks from the costume store. It was complete nightmare fuel! Children were crying and it was all I could do not to leave on the spot!”
4. “I was at a wedding in which someone’s sanitary pad fell off in the middle of the dance floor, and someone else just kicked it to the side...where it sat all night.”
5. “My cousin had a break dancer at their wedding. He was pretty good, until he split his pants during his act, revealing to everyone that he was going commando. But he gave zero fucks and just kept going.”
6. “At the beginning of the reception, the bride and groom made us all stand up and sing the National Anthem.”
7. “I attended my significant other’s coworker’s wedding, where the bride was 18 and the groom — her math teacher — was 29. We had McDonald’s for dinner, because that’s where they had gone on their first date, of course.”
“She spent the whole night dancing in a circle with her teen friends like it was her sweet 16 or something, while he drank with his 30-year-old buddies.”
8. “I worked a wedding for an older couple that had a groom’s cake featuring a manicured hand holding a penis. The writing said, ‘To have and to hold.’”
9. “The bride and groom were signing the marriage license and realized the bride didn’t know how to spell the groom’s last name.”
10. “At my uncle’s fifth or sixth wedding, he expected cash gifts only, and instead of enjoying his reception, he gathered all the envelopes and sat at a table with a notebook and calculator, counting all the money he got.”
“I was barely 20, and I had scrounged up 20 bucks to give him, but when I saw him counting everything with his damn reading glasses and calculator, I just kept it.”
11. “At the reception, the groom did a striptease while removing the bride’s garter, then remained topless for the remainder of the wedding.”
12. “At my cousin’s wedding, there was a party in the next room with an Elvis impersonator. He was loud enough to be heard over the ceremony, and as the couple was saying their vows, the nextdoor Elvis started singing ‘Suspicious Minds.’ It has lyrics that start out, ‘I’m caught in a trap, I can’t walk out...’”
13. “The bride sprayed each guest with a large bottle of her favorite perfume as we entered the banquet hall, saying that she loved the fragrance and wanted to ‘share that love’ with everyone celebrating with her and her new husband.”
14. “I was at a wedding where instead of the bride and groom making a speech thanking everyone, they did it like an awards show — the DJ opened up an envelope, announced the newlyweds’ names, and handed them ‘awards statues,’ which were really Barbie and Ken dolls. Then the couple thanked everyone as if making an acceptance speech.”
“In the right hands, it might have been funny, but the bride and groom are incredibly shy by nature, so it was just awkward.”
15. “I attended a wedding where the bride and her mom got into a fistfight in the church parking lot. The priest tried to break them up, and the mom punched him!”
16. “I went to a wedding in which the groom tried to throw a decently sized piece of cake at the bride, but the bride moved out of the way — so the cake ended up hitting my 76-year-old grandma instead!”
17. “The couple didn’t have waitstaff at their wedding, so they made their bridesmaids bus the tables.”
18. “The officiant bumped into the couple’s unity sand bottle, where they had both just put their sand. The bottle broke, and sand went flying everywhere.”
19. “At my uncle’s second wedding, the ceremony was too long because they handed out roses to everyone like it was an episode of The Bachelor. I got one for ‘being a wonderful niece.’”
20. “At my mother’s friend’s wedding, a theater troupe performed some kind of mime life story about the bride that took over 30 minutes!”
21. “Instead of throwing rice, confetti, or even sprinkles, the bride and groom had their friends save all their empty Juul pods and throw those at them.”
22. “At one wedding I attended, the family was very religious, and the father of the bride stood up at the beginning of the reception to tell everyone that dancing was a sin, and that there would be absolutely no dancing!”
“They still did the garter toss, but they did it by bringing the couple and the single men into a separate room and closing the doors. I’m still confused as to why dancing is sinful but a dude going up his bride’s skirt to throw lingerie to a crowd was acceptable.”
23. “I was at a wedding where the bride brought her daughter’s umbilical cord to the wedding.”
“No, her daughter wasn’t dead — she was alive and attended the wedding.”
24. “At my sister’s wedding, my mom caught the mother of the groom blowing the bartender in the back room.”
25. “I went to a wedding between an elderly pair, and the pastor didn’t speak English very well. Well, when he got to the end of the ceremony, he said, ‘You may kill the bride.’ He quickly corrected himself, but the whole church cringed.”
26. “I went to a wedding where the bride showed up almost two hours late...in her yoga outfit.”
“The groom shut it down when she refused to change her clothes, and he decided to leave her.”
27. “At a wedding I attended, the groom slipped the bride a lot of tongue. Like an awkward, gross amount of tongue. Everyone was uncomfortable.”
28. “I went to a very strange wedding in which the mother of the groom claimed she had a vision of ‘heavenly gold dust’ falling on the bride and groom on their big day. She then pulled out a container and started THROWING GOLD GLITTER at them! It was impossible not to laugh.”
29. “The bride and groom were at the altar, and the minister said, ‘We are in the presence of family and friends who are all here to give this union their blessing,’ to which the groom’s mother stood up and said, ‘No, not everyone — I do NOT give this my blessing.’ It was both horrible...and kind of hilarious.”
30. “The bride’s two sisters recited their speeches word-for-word from the bridal shower scene in the movie Bridesmaids. Hardly anyone got it, and it was awkward.”
31. “When my father-in-law married my wife’s stepmother, she came down the aisle with the back of her dress accidentally tucked into her nylons. We thought it was hilarious.”
32. “The bride’s wedding vows ended with, ‘I vow to never point a loaded gun at you again. Just remember, it’s my world — you’re just living in it.’ Her family kept talking about how beautiful her vows were.”
And finally: 33. “My 13-year-old cousin was in charge of videotaping my mom’s wedding ceremony on her cheap digital camcorder, and on our way to the reception, a guy on a bike pulled up next to our car, completely buck naked. My cousin couldn’t resist snagging a shot of that, and it turns out she recorded over some of my dad’s vows! My mom now has a 10-second clip of a naked cyclist on her wedding video.”