20 Of The Funniest Tweets About Married Life (Feb. 27 - March 4)

"The smug way my wife walks into the kitchen, casually opens a drawer, and pulls out the exact item she needs on the first try."

Marriage is full of highs, lows and a whole bunch of ordinary moments in between. Somehow the married people on X, formerly known as Twitter, continue to find humor in the minutiae of wedded life.

Every week, we round up the funniest marriage tweets on the platform. Read on for 20 relatable ones that will have you laughing in agreement.

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Before You Go

7 Products That Can Help You Reconnect With Your Partner
The Hypervolt massage gun for an act of service that helps you release stress together(01 of07)
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"I’ve been fortunate to have learned a lot as a clinician, but also as a loving partner," said licensed marriage and family therapist David Ibrahim. He explained that it can be helpful for partners to remind each other that they are on the same team. "My wife and I... tell each other at least once a week 'teamwork makes the dream work', and 'together we’re better.' [It may sound corny] but it gets us through raising children in a blended family, bills, work, family issues, yadda yadda.

"One way to feel like you're on the same team is [to] take a few minutes to massage each other's stress out of the body," Ibrahim explained. "My favorite device my wife and I regularly use is [the] Hypervolt [massage gun], it comes with easy videos to learn how to use it and it's amazing how it releases stress from the body. Taking a few minutes to massage one another is a wonderful act of service and puts some of those bonus love dollars in the attraction account for each other. It's the little details that make a loving partnership so special."

This massage gun features three speeds and five interchangeable heads to treat small and large muscles. It's also designed to be impressively quiet.
(credit:Amazon)
Or the Theragun Relief massage gun, which I own and love(02 of07)
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Based on Ibrahim’s massage gun suggestion, we chose another massage option from popular brand Therabody. Theraguns may well be the cream of the crop of massage guns; I’ve tried several of their models and own the Theragun Relief myself, and it provides muscle-melting relief from my muscle pain and tension. It’s lightweight and easy to grip, so you can easily use it by yourself or with a partner, and it pounds out aches and stress with the strength of a giant and surprising gentleness, given its effectiveness.

You can also toggle between three intensity settings and three massage head attachments.
(credit:Amazon)
A card game for mature couples who have been together for years(03 of07)
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Ibrahim also recommended this card game, which is specifically designed for couples who've been together 10-plus years.

"Before dinner, leverage something like Couple Reconnect, a fun card game for couples that have been together for years but are fizzling out," Ibrahim wrote. It uses techniques from couples therapy and other modalities to spark deep conversation, romance and connection.
(credit:Amazon)
A couples card game that's internet-viral(04 of07)
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The We're Not Really Strangers couples card game is another excellent option that's popular across TikTok and is designed for both old and new couples.

"Some questions might be things you never asked each other or [your] answers may change," said licensed marriage and family therapist Yara Mawad. It has three different "levels" of questions so you can work up to different layers of connection.

Example questions include "What do we have in this relationship that you never thought was possible?" and "What assumption did you make about me that turned out to be false?"
(credit:Amazon)
A capsule jar of date ideas to encourage new experiences(05 of07)
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Mawad also suggested this jar of date ideas so you can try new activities and experiences together, ideally at least once a week. "Experiencing new things together can show you a different side of your partner and can re-spark excitement in your relationship and connection," she noted.

The one rule you should keep in mind on your dates, according to Mawad? "Keep the kid talk at home if you have children," she advised. "Use this time to reconnect with each other and remind yourselves who you married/who you are dating and show gratitude and appreciation for one another as humans, not just the roles you play in life."

The jar offers 50 date ideas in fun, sleek capsules to help keep things fresh. Examples of date ideas include going out only for dessert, going to a local sports game, hiking and watching the sunset.
(credit:Amazon)
A bestselling workbook to improve your self-growth(06 of07)
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"A lot of the time we want to work with our partner to improve our connection and relationships, but a lot of relational work is also self growth, and our own emotional regulation that impacts the union of the relationship," Mawad explained. "This workbook could help individuals increase awareness and gain tools for more effective communication, better listening skills and implementing emotional regulation that can be used to enhance the relationship and improve connection." (credit:Amazon)
Bumble BFF, an app for making friends so you can widen your support circle(07 of07)
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Ibrahim recommended widening your support network with therapists, family relationships and other support systems. He suggested using Bumble BFF, which you can use for finding new friends "so you don’t over burden or take advantage of your partners emotional bandwidth."

(You may have heard of Bumble as a dating app; it also has a friends-only setting, known as Bumble BFF, as well as a setting for business networking.)
(credit:Bumble)

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