The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our day with their brilliant and succinct wit. And although the platform has rebranded to X, their humor lives on.
Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up their hilarious musings. Scroll through this weekās great tweets from women, and then visit our āFunniest Tweets From Womenā page for past roundups.
Itās ok to not have a Valentine on Valentineās Day. I didnāt have a groundhog on Groundhogās Day
— Stone Cold Jane Austen (@AbbyHiggs) February 13, 2024
I do the NYT's Connections every morning and then spend the rest of the day hating myself because I didn't realize those four names were all doomed whaling ships built in 1832.
— Jelisa Castrodale (@gordonshumway) February 14, 2024
Itās kinda crazy that now weāre old enough for my friends to be holding the serious roles lmao like girl how you the director of marketing you mad grown
— Sade (@_munchkinn) February 13, 2024
My parents have been married 60 years. My mom told me she has been giving my dad the same Valentineās Day card for TWENTY years. And the beauty is he has no idea. He reads it in its entirety every year. And then she puts it back in a drawer for next year. Freaking genius.
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) February 13, 2024
This is how I watch Great British Bake Off pic.twitter.com/T2HaTrGRaV
— Rohita Kadambi (@RohitaKadambi) February 12, 2024
The first few notes of Yeah are like sleeper agent trigger words that activate older millennials
— Amy A (@lolennui) February 12, 2024
I consider myself reasonably intelligent but I cannot process How to Play Complex Board Games. You all sound like, "and then if you roll a level-up glitter cabbage you get 6.5 ergometric points, which can be used every 4th turn as long as no one has zorped the Cones of Dunshire"
— Amy Colleen (@sewistwrites) February 13, 2024
me after crying for six hours: https://t.co/QwM1V3z90S
— Jenni (@hashjenni) February 13, 2024
I hate how I am a "I have an appointment at 4pm so I can't do anything all day" type of person
— Invisš§āļø (@invis4yo) February 13, 2024
I donāt believe Taylor/Travis is a PR relationship but I do believe they got together in a Princess Diaries 2 eligible bachelor slideshow way and she was like yeah he seems hot and fun and he was like yay!!! Neat š
— danielle weisberg for hire (@danielleweisber) February 12, 2024
i was crazy and i was not free pic.twitter.com/gGMneg3X5O
— alisa (@squirtstain) February 13, 2024
This is what Girls really talk about pic.twitter.com/d55vtJp54U
— michaela okland (@MichaelaOkla) February 11, 2024
why is that sometimes eggs are the most delectable meal youāve ever had in your life and then randomly one day theyāre an abomination and you have to choke them down like youāre being force-fed
— ellie schnitt (@holy_schnitt) February 12, 2024
the landlord painting over a moth on my bedroom wall before I move in pic.twitter.com/cmvFehqyL3
— first name lexi (@lexishaye_) February 13, 2024
Fashion week is so funny the most beautiful girl you know is posting a pic like "thank you cetaphil š what a beautiful night š«¶š½"
— raina (@quakerraina) February 11, 2024
why tf would you wanna smell āthe struggle is realā in your house https://t.co/ITpib8XjwL
— kira š¾ (@kirawontmiss) February 12, 2024
You canāt take away snow days and make them remote learning days. Snow days arenāt about learning. If god wanted the children to learn, he wouldnāt have made it snow.
— Samantha Ruddy (@samlymatters) February 13, 2024
Dolly Parton should open a Trader Joeās type store and call it Traitor Joleneās.
— .:RiotGrlErin:. (@RiotGrlErin) February 12, 2024
there should be an opposite of valentineās day where you post instagram photos of your enemy
— trash jones (@jzux) February 14, 2024
Everyone when Tom Brady retires: "Finally. I'm so sick of watching the same team win over and over again. It's our turn now."
— Lauren (@dogmomRN23) February 12, 2024
Patrick Mahomes: pic.twitter.com/YcOZJEZjsl
wish iād been a wicked theater kid (popular) instead of a spring awakening theater kid (depressed)
— ashley rayš¦ice cream money out 3/1 (@theashleyray) February 12, 2024
true crime documentary narrator: how did this missing persons case go unsolved for more than 20 years?
— Janel Comeau (@VeryBadLlama) February 15, 2024
police officer: yeah so the family reported their daughter missing and then we told them that she was probably fine and didn't look for her at all
FINALLY FOUND MISS MARY MAC pic.twitter.com/roJnMGsHqm
— Mel āØšāļø (@AmorasQueen) February 11, 2024
I do love it when pregnancy announcement posts show the couple holding up a positive test. āWeāre having a baby, hereās a stick full of my piss šā
— Emily Murnane (@emily_murnane) February 14, 2024
British people ate with āWhatās all this then?!ā
— Grip Bayless (@talleyberrybaby) February 15, 2024
BECAUSE NO REALLY, WHATāS ALL THIS THEN???????????
Me: I hate country music
— šProstitution Whoreš (@Pr0sttti0nWh0re) February 12, 2024
BeyoncƩ: *drops two country songs*
Me: pic.twitter.com/5VSJb0zLg3
just had a bad flashback to Valentineās Day at my high school. you could buy roses to send to people & theyād be delivered during class, so we all got to watch the popular girls get eight while we just sat there!
— Alicia A-Z, PhD, she/her (@aliciaandrz) February 13, 2024
but Iām a writer now so Iām glad I learned about rejection early.
when your popular friend runs into someone they know pic.twitter.com/PasUhR8f5P
— Invisš§āļø (@invis4yo) February 15, 2024
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Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
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