"You obviously don't respect yourself, so why should we?"
"Per a company-wide email we got this morning, he’s dead to us" after his endorsed candidates bombed in the midterms, Bowen Yang's "Brian Kilmeade" announces.
Meanwhile "Chuck Schumer" calls DoorDash for mustard on insurrection day, and James Austin Johnson's Trump drowns in word mash.
Aidy Bryant's Ted Cruz wanted to know how to shut down "toxic, extremist" Facebook groups like "Ted Cruz Sucks."
"Dad" poses for prom photos with his daughter and her date with a shotgun. "People are doing it. It's a thing, like 'Bang!'" explains Bennett in explosive sketch.
"We're so close to the end" of the pandemic, "let's ruin it!" says Cece Vuvuzela (Maya Rudolph) on crazy game show.
“Is your heart not working, baby? This is your mother here.”
"Where the hell you been? It's been three hours!"
Firing is just "conscious unemploying," she informs Heidi Gardner's character on "Weekend Update."
"Everyone’s pumped, from white men over 60 to white men over 70," gushes "SNL's" Mitch McConnell.