It’s hard to stay on top of what’s on Donald Trump’s calendar. But don’t worry, Jimmy Fallon’s prepared a little rhyme that may be useful.
“Trump is busy. He’s got fundraisers, he has meetings, court dates. His schedule is all over the place. If you’re having trouble keeping track, let me help you out,” the “Tonight Show” host said Tuesday.
With the help of a little rhythm, the comedian delivered his ditty about the cash-strapped, four-times-indicted presumptive Republican presidential nominee:
“Sunday: campaign. Monday: court. Tuesday: campaign. Wednesday: back to court. Thursday: campaign, raise some money. Friday: court case, lose that money. Fly to Florida, on the go. Doing taxes? How about no. Buy Truth Social’s failing stock, never post without caps lock. Selling Bibles — only hope. Kind of like an orange pope. Hats and sneakers, payment plan, pretty soon on OnlyFans. Back to Florida, need vacay, wait for album, by Taytay. Need to fundraise, debt so big. Yell ‘the Powerball is rigged!’ New gag order, violate. Stormy turns down second date. D.C., New York, back to Florida, wear more makeup than Sephora. Here there here, the stock went lower, fixed your hair with a leaf blower. Bingbong dingdong having fun, stare directly at the sun.”
Watch Fallon in action below.